Sunday, September 13, 2015

It's Time to Rise Up

As I was worshipping this morning in church, I really felt the spirit of God pressing upon me saying to me it is time to rise up and take back our families from Satan.  Now is the time to get on your knees and pray for your family. Your husband, your children and their spouses and children.  We sit around wondering why God doesn't do anything to help us in our situations yet we don't invest as much time praying for our families as we do looking at social media.  I am convicted to get off social media and on my knees to take back my family.

Most often we are weak and shallow Christians making little impact yet we have a huge arsenal of weapons at our disposal which we never maximize. It is time to stop putting down our husbands on social media and stop expecting our children to misbehave because that's just what they do. Ladies it is time to take up our weapons and fight for our families. Put your husband in his rightful place and let God do the work on him. Stop expecting him to meet your needs and allow God to meet your needs. Don't put your children on pedestals above your husband. Your husband comes first.  Your marriage and your husband are far more important than your children. If that relationship isn't working the way it should be then your children aren't receiving the benefit of Godly parents.  Don't expect your children to misbehave but expect them to do great things for the kingdom of God.

I've been there and done all of the wrong things with my family. By not putting my husband in his rightful place I didn't give him the ability to be the man that God called him to be. Because of my rejection and disapproval my husband believed he would be happier without his family. I see this happening all around me with women my age. Too much time is spent on the children and the husband feels rejected and disrespected and decides to find that respect elsewhere. Marriages are crumbling and all we do is moan and groan about how our husband didn't do this or that or whatever.

Ladies we need to step up and start being warrior women of God who are fighting for our husbands and our families. I've stood by far too long asking God to change my husband when my heart is the first that needed to change. I believe that it doesn't matter where our husbands are in their walk as long as we are supporters and encourages God will use them anyway. I realize that I stood in Gods way and I was the reason that I didn't see God at work in my husband.

Even though I'm divorced I still have a calling on my life to fight for my family. And it is a battle that I need to be prepared for as Satan thinks he has already won. I believe the battle is just beginning. If it takes the last breath I have I will continue to pray for restoration for my family because I am convinced this will bring the most glory to God and will be the best testimony for others to see God.

Would you join me in getting on your knees to pray for your families and begin to take your family back from the enemy. Don't be a casual observer but be a fierce warrior woman of God ready to rise up and fight for what is rightfully hers. Let's not be content with broken families and broken lives. Let's pray for all of the blessings that are rightfully ours as children of God.  Let's rise up and make a difference to our families. 

Tuesday, May 19, 2015

25th Wedding Anniversary

Today would have been my 25th wedding anniversary had we not divorced in 2010.  Thinking forward to this day, I thought that I would never have arrived where I am without continued sadness and regrets.  While I do have my regrets, they do not overwhelm me like they have in the past. And the sadness is only momentary.  In honor of 25 would be years of marriage, I’ve written this list of 25 truths I’ve learned from my divorce.  So Happy Anniversary to me!

1.       Self-worth does not depend on someone’s inability to love me but on my ability to love myself.

2.       Beauty is not in the eye of the beholder but comes from within.

3.       Being alone doesn’t necessarily mean you will be lonely.

4.       Strength comes from broken places.

5.       Bitterness breaks down but forgiveness builds up.

6.       There is definitely light at the end of the tunnel.

7.       There are seasons to grief and all are necessary for healing.

8.       I can do more than I ever imagined and am stronger than I realized.

9.       Contentment comes from recognizing your true worth.

10.   True love does not keep a record of wrongs but rejoices in the truth.

11.   Hateful words have no power over me.

12.   Peace and contentment are found only in a deep abiding relationship with my Creator.

13.   Laughter is an important part of life.

14.   Being joyful is a choice.

15.   Learning to love myself is the most important part of a relationship.

16.   Selfishness strangles relationships; compassion builds them up.

17.   Anger is a result of expectations which do not line up with reality.

18.   Letting go of past wrongs is an important part of healing.

19.   A broken heart will mend in time.

20.   Grace and mercy are given to us in abundance and therefore we should give freely as well.

21.   Having a relationship with my ex-husband is more important for our family than holding a grudge and building a wall between us.

22.   Kindness and compassion are elements of unconditional love.

23.   The world doesn’t offer great advice and shouldn’t be where we seek our counsel.

24.   A marriage covenant isn’t easily broken and shouldn’t be taken lightly.

25.   Weeping only lasts for a night and joy does come in the morning.

Sunday, January 18, 2015


Have you ever believed that you've received a word from God? That He has told you specifically what you are to do and even though it seems impossible you just know that it was from God and you cannot turn your back on it even though you may want to? That's how I feel about standing for the reconciliation of my marriage. I believed and still believe to the very depths of my soul that God had called me to pray for my husband and to stand for the reconciliation of my marriage. I also believed that He had shown me it would be in the fifth year that my husband would return. And this just happens to be the fifth year. Things were going along well and I had peace and faith that this would come to pass. Until right before Christmas when my world was turned upside down. 
Facebook can be a dangerous tool. It can cause your heart to go into a tailspin if you find out information that you weren't meant to know. This happened to me. I was snooping on someone's page and I saw a post that essentially said my husband now had a fiancé. This took my breath away. My immediate reaction was not very pleasant and I reacted regretfully in not a very Christ like manner. My world began to spin and I couldn't breathe. Could it be? She was engaged to my husband? (You have to stop here and realize that while we are EX spouses I do consider him and will continue to call him my husband due to the covenant we made when we were married.) My mind was turning and the anger began to boil within me. This was not according to my plan. You see not more than two months ago, my husband had told me he would not marry her and that she was not the one. He told me more things but let's just leave it at that. I believed him. But then I always believed him. Maybe that was my mistake all along.

As the anger boiled, I began to contact my children and my friends. Did you know about this? Can you believe this? What on earth is going on? I caused quite a commotion among my family and I wish that I could say I handled it in a better way than I did. But unfortunately I didn't handle this news well at all. I then realized, that my sister in law, whom I thought I was developing a new friendship with, had totally blocked me on Facebook. I was unprepared for all of this and needless to say fell into a very dark place. I decided that Facebook was not my friend and it wasn't the best place for me right now as I really wanted to bash them all in a status posting and thankfully I can say I did not do that. I deactivated my Facebook account for a time so that I could gather myself and figure out what I was going to do now.

So I began to question God. I began to grow angry with Him. Why would you lead me down this path to forsake me after all this time? Why would you give me this hope when you were just going to allow it to be pulled away from me like this? Why have you not done anything? You could have fixed this years ago and you haven't. Where are you God? Obviously you don't care about me or my life or you would have saved me this pain. I wish that I could say after a few days I stepped up and came to my senses. But it took a bit longer than that. I began to think how I could manipulate this situation for my benefit. So I called my husband. He confused me even more by saying that he just bought her a ring and it isn't like they are getting married any time soon. What? Seriously? Does he not understand what a woman thinks about an engagement ring? So our conversation went on and finally I began to sob and told him that I needed to get him out of my life. 
After weeks of feeling alone, rejected, forsaken, and very bitter, my heart has begun to gain some ground. I began to think about Moses and the journey to the Promised Land. Moses believed God with his whole heart and he set off on a journey that would end up taking many years and bringing much grief and pain. But in the end, God did fulfill His promise. I realize that Moses and his people had a lot to learn about God's provision and I believe that I do as well. I'm convinced that our journey is not so much about the final result as it is about the life that we lead in the process. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that God has called me to this journey and I will not let Him down.  I do love my husband and want him to come home but not without putting God first in both of our lives.  I want God to receive the glory in this and I believe with my whole heart that the greatest glory will come from a reconciled marriage.  I trust Him for He has not forsaken me. 
I have been listening to a song these past few weeks that has fed my soul and lifted me up and made me to realize that no matter what may come I have peace because I know the God of yesterday, today and forever. And as this song says, far be it from me to not believe even when my eyes can't see and this mountain that's in front of me will be thrown into the midst of the sea. Grander earth has quaked before.

Know therefore that the LORD your God is God; he is the faithful God, keeping his covenant of love to a thousand generations of those who love him and keep his commands.  Deuteronomy 7:9