Tuesday, September 29, 2009

I'm Never Alone

I've been going through a hard time lately. Feeling alone and afraid. Exhausted, frustrated, confused. In my life, music always speaks to my soul and today was no exception. I heard Barlow Girl's song "Never Alone" and it reminded me of a time when God told me I was never alone.

I was a teenager going on a bike ride with my youth group. I remember I'd had a hard day and ended it with a flat tire on my bike. I was exhausted, frustrated, lonely and losing hope. At night I prayed that God would speak to me, show himself to me, something so that I would really know he was there. Then in my head I heard something tell me to hold up my arm and look at my hand. Now, I was in the bed, going to sleep and it was pitch black in my room. I couldn't see two inches in front of my face much less see my hand on the end of my arm. But obediently, and feeling rather foolish, I held up my arm. I looked at my hand and laughed. I can't see my hand - so now what God? He spoke again and told me that this was how it is with him. Though I cannot see it, I know my hand is there. In comparison, though I cannot see him, I know that he is there. God will never leave me. He will never forsake me.

Here are the lyrics to Never Alone. And remember You are never alone!

Joshua 1:5 "No one will be able to stand up against you all the days of your life. As I was with Moses, so I will be with you; I will never leave you nor forsake you."

Barlow Girl "Never Alone"

I waited for you today
But You didn't show
No no no.
I needed you today
So where did you go?
You told me to call
said you'd be there
And though I haven't seen you
Are you still there?

I cry out with no reply and
I can't feel you by my side
So I'll hold tight to what I know
You're here and I'm never alone.

And though I can not see you
and I can't explain why.
Such a deep, deep reassurance
You've placed in my life

We cannot separate
'Cause You're part of me
and though You're invisible
I'll trust the unseen

I cry out with no reply
And I can't feel you by my side
So I'll hold tight to what I know
You're here and I'm never alone

Monday, September 14, 2009

Whatever You're Doing (Sanctus Real)

Love this song!

It's time for healing time to move on
It's time to fix what's been broken too long
Time to make right what has been wrong
It's time to find my way to where I belong
There's a wave that's crashing over me
And all I can do is surrender

Whatever You're doing inside of me
It feels like chaos but somehow there's peace
It's hard to surrender to what I can't see
but I'm giving in to something Heavenly

Time for a milestone
Time to begin again
Reevaluate who I really am
Am I doing everything to follow Your will
Or just climbing aimlessly over these hills
So show me what it is You want from me
I give everything I surrender...

Whatever You're doing inside of me
It feels like chaos but somehow there's peace
It's hard to surrender to what I can't see
but I'm giving in to something Heavenly

Time to face up
Clean this old house
Time to breathe in and let everything out
That I've wanted to say for so many years
Time to release all my held back tears

Whatever You're doing inside of me
It feels like chaos but I believe
You're up to something bigger than me
Larger than life something Heavenly.

Lord I pray that you would continue to do something heavenly within me. I give you all that holds me back from serving you. Place me right in the middle of your will. Show me the way I should go -- for to you I lift up my soul.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Psalm 143

"O Lord, hear my prayer, listen to my cry for mercy; in your faithfulness and righteousness come to my relief. Do not bring your servant into judgment for no one living is righteous before you.

The enemy pursues me, he crushes me to the ground; he makes me dwell in darkness like those long dead. So my spirit grows faint within me; my heart within me is dismayed.

I remember the days of long ago; I meditate on all your works and consider what your hands have done. I spread out my hands to you; my soul thirsts for you like a parched land.

Answer me quickly, O Lord; my spirit fails. Do not hide your face from me or I will be like those who go down to the pit. Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I lift up my soul. Rescue me from my enemies, O Lord, for I hide myself in you. Teach me to do your will, for you are my God; may your good Spirit lead me on level ground.

For your name's sake, O Lord, preserve my life; in your righteousness, bring me out of trouble. In your unfailing love, silence my enemies; destroy all my foes, for I am your servant."

What a wonderful prayer for times when we feel the most hopeless.

Lord please give me an unquenchable desire to seek you in the morning, to put my trust in you, and to lift up my soul. Then you will show me your unfailing love. Teach me to do your will and lead me on level ground. I am your servant.

Monday, September 7, 2009


Wow, did I get sidetracked. 10 1/2 months since I blogged. Really 10 1/2 months since I had my eyes on the prize. What a fine example I have set for myself. I can't believe I let myself become so distracted that I lost sight of my goal. The goal of following Christ. But this world got in the way.

My failure was that I did not continue to watch and pray as Mark 14:38 says. "Watch and pray so that you do not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the body is weak." Our bodies betray us. We fall prey to our sinful nature. Satan wants nothing more than to cause us to stray. He reminds us that we are weak and puts things in our path that show us just how weak we are.

Romans 7:18-19

"I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it. "

But through Christ we have overcome this sinful nature. We must stay focused on Christ and live by the Spirit.

Galations 5:16-17

"So I say, live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the sinful nature. For the sinful nature desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the sinful nature. They are in conflict with each other, so that you do not do what you want."

Galatians 5:24

"Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires."

Our nature is to sin. But if we belong to Jesus, that sin nature is crucified with Christ. I pray that I will not forget to daily seek God so I may fight the enemy who is on constant attack. Look out Satan, you are not getting the victory over me. No matter what my circumstances, I will look to and worship the One who has changed me. I'm back and I'm going to get it right this time!